A VISIT TO THE CLINIC

This morning, i went to a free TCM clinic for a consultation regarding my body, my menses is too irregular.

I went to see this TCM doctor which is specialise in gynae problems, mainly people who had difficulty in having children. When i see the doctor, she ask what is my problem and i told her and she ask me whether am i married, how many children ect.

I told her i am married for 4year but still no children cuz i don't want to have any. Then, she got very upset and said that have children must have it when one is young but the problem is i don't want any, i don't have the mentality, i still like my present life, carefree and travelling around the world with hubby.

She ask what if i were to be pregnant? This is a very senstitive question. If it was the former me, i will consider aborting it cuz i am not a buddhist, now, after going for classes and dharmma talk, chanting ect, i will give birth to it and love it with my own heart and sent my child to dharmma classes. Going for chanting ect and listening to dharmma talk made me more faithful in having a child.

If don't have much better, more carefree, can travel around the world, spend as and when i like but if have a child, i will have to be more prudent with my spending and no more holidays. Also, more time will be invested into the child but i am really thankful to my mum for making the decision to give birth to me when she is only 19 years old. If not, i won't have the chance to come into this world and had the chance to repent and the chance to get close to Buddha and a chance to go to the pureland of Buddha and attain enlightement.

Last time, i don't have this mentality, i thought money is everything and that i chose the wrong family but now i see the other side and learn that being rich can't buy everything and enlightement. Through some of my hardships in my life, i learn to be stronger and i had a chance to create good Karma thanks to my father who had been bad to us all these years if i am able to forgive him.

So whether have a child or no child, i don't really care. What i care for is i will gain englightement and will not come back to this world again. I want to be Buddha's good disciple every single life.

Amituofo May I be well and happy always, May i be free from sickness, dieases and emnity. May i be reborn into the pureland of Buddha and Bodhisattva.