To my beloved husband:
Though we may not be well-off now, lets work hard, don't give up, continue to pray hard for a brighter future.
Though bread and butter is equally important in this modern society, let's hope our love, gratitude and patience will outgrow it.
Let's continue to give each other support through trials and tribulations.
Let's thanks our parents for bringing us into this world to let us learn through life. Though our parents did not give us money, house or car but they give us life and a whole and healthy body.
Be Happy Always No Matter What Happen!
May Buddhas of the ten directions be with us and guide us always.
Amituofo!
Friday, August 20, 2010
MY LOVE FOR MY HUSBAND
I am feeling so down today, I need some comfort and a shoulder to rely on, someone to hear my grumblings.
Got scolded by my manager today cuz of my bad performance at work. She said she doesn't trust me to assign work to me anymore:( I am so sad:( Trust is the most important key, if she, my superior doesn't have trust in me anymore then what's the point of me staying in this company.
I really hate that someone who belittle people by criticizing him/her. I am not so bad ok, after working here for nearly three years, this is the comment that I had get.
To think that my leave for the 12 days of holiday in October had been approved, and bonus coming this December, this is what she said to me.
Forget about it, will see how things goes. Don't know why after listening to Dharma talks, when i was getting the scolding from my manager, I do not feel sad ect. My heart actually was quite peaceful, strange. If before, maybe i will throw the letter at her straight away but now I had to be patience cuz of my holiday in October, year end bonus and the monthly payment for my house.
It was indeed through times of adversity, that i feel closer to my husband cuz he is the only one i can relate to.
Two hands closely held together, we known each other for 10 years, though not long. We may not be well-off now, but lets hope we had another better off 60 years.
Let's hope for a brighter and better tomorrow:)
Amituofo
Got scolded by my manager today cuz of my bad performance at work. She said she doesn't trust me to assign work to me anymore:( I am so sad:( Trust is the most important key, if she, my superior doesn't have trust in me anymore then what's the point of me staying in this company.
I really hate that someone who belittle people by criticizing him/her. I am not so bad ok, after working here for nearly three years, this is the comment that I had get.
To think that my leave for the 12 days of holiday in October had been approved, and bonus coming this December, this is what she said to me.
Forget about it, will see how things goes. Don't know why after listening to Dharma talks, when i was getting the scolding from my manager, I do not feel sad ect. My heart actually was quite peaceful, strange. If before, maybe i will throw the letter at her straight away but now I had to be patience cuz of my holiday in October, year end bonus and the monthly payment for my house.
It was indeed through times of adversity, that i feel closer to my husband cuz he is the only one i can relate to.
Two hands closely held together, we known each other for 10 years, though not long. We may not be well-off now, but lets hope we had another better off 60 years.
Let's hope for a brighter and better tomorrow:)
Amituofo
Sunday, February 15, 2009
MEDITATION
Yesterday i went for my 1st meditation class. Before this, i was configuring whether to go or not. Actually i am a very careless person, i think it's got to do with my character.
I had been reminded many times by my husband not to be so forgetful and careless but in the end the same old fault keep coming back. He also told me that if i were to go for meditation class, i won't make it cuz in real life, my mind is very scattered not concentrated.
Without lots of faith, i went for the class and it feel glad. My mind is so peaceful and quiet which i do not have this feeling before. I even heard my heart beating softly and gently, very subtle. I was amazed at this feeling. I told my husband even 1 million can't buy this type of feeling.
Usually, i like to speak to husband and my mind is pre-occupied but in the class, my mind just feel like being quiet.
But once i step out of the temple, my mind begin to be pre-occupied with things again. When can i break the bond of evil and stop commiting sins and turn to good deeds? I had been trying so hard but its difficult.
I am lucky to got in touch with Buddhism when i am still in my twenties cuz during my past years in this life, i think i had done lots of bad deeds but little good deeds. I am afraid of being punished in hell.
The only think i can think of is to pray to the buddha and ask buddha to give me a longer life span like until 80 years? So that, i can accumulate more mertis in this life.
I had been reminded many times by my husband not to be so forgetful and careless but in the end the same old fault keep coming back. He also told me that if i were to go for meditation class, i won't make it cuz in real life, my mind is very scattered not concentrated.
Without lots of faith, i went for the class and it feel glad. My mind is so peaceful and quiet which i do not have this feeling before. I even heard my heart beating softly and gently, very subtle. I was amazed at this feeling. I told my husband even 1 million can't buy this type of feeling.
Usually, i like to speak to husband and my mind is pre-occupied but in the class, my mind just feel like being quiet.
But once i step out of the temple, my mind begin to be pre-occupied with things again. When can i break the bond of evil and stop commiting sins and turn to good deeds? I had been trying so hard but its difficult.
I am lucky to got in touch with Buddhism when i am still in my twenties cuz during my past years in this life, i think i had done lots of bad deeds but little good deeds. I am afraid of being punished in hell.
The only think i can think of is to pray to the buddha and ask buddha to give me a longer life span like until 80 years? So that, i can accumulate more mertis in this life.
Friday, October 24, 2008
WESTERN PURELAND
I finally get a glimpse into the pureland of Amituofo buddha through one of the animation vcd.
After watching and listening the vcd, my heart feel very happy and peaceful and i wanted to be reborn in the pureland of Amituofo.
Don't know why, whenever i heard chanting sound. I will feel very peaceful and had a very familiar feeling, like don't know when i heard it before.
Being reborn to that place is a good thing, everybody is kind-hearted and there will be no one who wil find fault with you ect. No more old age, sickness and death. No more working:). That's place sound very beautiful and i aspire to go there.
I will pray that all my past and present life debtors will forgive me and will not haunt me. I heard that this is a very powerful thing. From this day onwards, i will not harm any beings and will not bring harm to others.
After watching and listening the vcd, my heart feel very happy and peaceful and i wanted to be reborn in the pureland of Amituofo.
Don't know why, whenever i heard chanting sound. I will feel very peaceful and had a very familiar feeling, like don't know when i heard it before.
Being reborn to that place is a good thing, everybody is kind-hearted and there will be no one who wil find fault with you ect. No more old age, sickness and death. No more working:). That's place sound very beautiful and i aspire to go there.
I will pray that all my past and present life debtors will forgive me and will not haunt me. I heard that this is a very powerful thing. From this day onwards, i will not harm any beings and will not bring harm to others.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
A VISIT TO THE CLINIC
This morning, i went to a free TCM clinic for a consultation regarding my body, my menses is too irregular.
I went to see this TCM doctor which is specialise in gynae problems, mainly people who had difficulty in having children. When i see the doctor, she ask what is my problem and i told her and she ask me whether am i married, how many children ect.
I told her i am married for 4year but still no children cuz i don't want to have any. Then, she got very upset and said that have children must have it when one is young but the problem is i don't want any, i don't have the mentality, i still like my present life, carefree and travelling around the world with hubby.
She ask what if i were to be pregnant? This is a very senstitive question. If it was the former me, i will consider aborting it cuz i am not a buddhist, now, after going for classes and dharmma talk, chanting ect, i will give birth to it and love it with my own heart and sent my child to dharmma classes. Going for chanting ect and listening to dharmma talk made me more faithful in having a child.
If don't have much better, more carefree, can travel around the world, spend as and when i like but if have a child, i will have to be more prudent with my spending and no more holidays. Also, more time will be invested into the child but i am really thankful to my mum for making the decision to give birth to me when she is only 19 years old. If not, i won't have the chance to come into this world and had the chance to repent and the chance to get close to Buddha and a chance to go to the pureland of Buddha and attain enlightement.
Last time, i don't have this mentality, i thought money is everything and that i chose the wrong family but now i see the other side and learn that being rich can't buy everything and enlightement. Through some of my hardships in my life, i learn to be stronger and i had a chance to create good Karma thanks to my father who had been bad to us all these years if i am able to forgive him.
So whether have a child or no child, i don't really care. What i care for is i will gain englightement and will not come back to this world again. I want to be Buddha's good disciple every single life.
Amituofo May I be well and happy always, May i be free from sickness, dieases and emnity. May i be reborn into the pureland of Buddha and Bodhisattva.
I went to see this TCM doctor which is specialise in gynae problems, mainly people who had difficulty in having children. When i see the doctor, she ask what is my problem and i told her and she ask me whether am i married, how many children ect.
I told her i am married for 4year but still no children cuz i don't want to have any. Then, she got very upset and said that have children must have it when one is young but the problem is i don't want any, i don't have the mentality, i still like my present life, carefree and travelling around the world with hubby.
She ask what if i were to be pregnant? This is a very senstitive question. If it was the former me, i will consider aborting it cuz i am not a buddhist, now, after going for classes and dharmma talk, chanting ect, i will give birth to it and love it with my own heart and sent my child to dharmma classes. Going for chanting ect and listening to dharmma talk made me more faithful in having a child.
If don't have much better, more carefree, can travel around the world, spend as and when i like but if have a child, i will have to be more prudent with my spending and no more holidays. Also, more time will be invested into the child but i am really thankful to my mum for making the decision to give birth to me when she is only 19 years old. If not, i won't have the chance to come into this world and had the chance to repent and the chance to get close to Buddha and a chance to go to the pureland of Buddha and attain enlightement.
Last time, i don't have this mentality, i thought money is everything and that i chose the wrong family but now i see the other side and learn that being rich can't buy everything and enlightement. Through some of my hardships in my life, i learn to be stronger and i had a chance to create good Karma thanks to my father who had been bad to us all these years if i am able to forgive him.
So whether have a child or no child, i don't really care. What i care for is i will gain englightement and will not come back to this world again. I want to be Buddha's good disciple every single life.
Amituofo May I be well and happy always, May i be free from sickness, dieases and emnity. May i be reborn into the pureland of Buddha and Bodhisattva.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
MY BUSY & OCCUPIED LIFE
Ever since i had shifted house, i became more and more busy with my life and this had made me more occupied and happier.
When i got my house key, i am busy with my new house renovation and almost all of them are diy by me and hubby:) I had even became a painting expert by helping my hubby paint the whole house. Three bedrooms and 1 living room:).
Now, looking back and seeing the whole house covered with paints ect. These are the result of our hardwork of labour and sweat. We had diy the kitchen cabinet, sink, one table hanged on the wall, dining table and chair, tv console, walk-in-wardrobe, our platform bed and a feature wall to cover up the ugly bomb shelter.
We had refused to spend the money for renovation as we are thinking of selling off the house and moving to a smaller house 5 years later. Now, i am glad that we did save all our hard-earned money from spending them on those renovation contractors.
Firstly, now the market is so bad and we can't withdraw our money from our investment, if not we will lose a huge amount.
Secondly, we are hardly at home. Weekdays whole day off to work, back at home 7.30pm. Saturday half of the day spent doing household chores, 5pm off to the temple, 11pm back at home sleep. Sunday, Morning 8am off to the temple again, need to go back to mother-in-law's house, my mother's house. Back at home at night again.
So, now my life is more routine and occupied. Weekdays work, Saturday household chores and temple, Sunday morning temple, afternoon and evening still had to go back to my mother and parent-in-laws' house.
Poor hubby and me, hardly had time for ourselves. Our life is occupied with entertaining and playing different roles and characters. For me, subordinate to my bosses in my office, dutiful, loving and caring wife to my hubby at home, had some quiet time with Buddha and Bodhisattva, for weekend, became a maid liao, keeping the house clean and tidy, washing clothes ect. In the temple, play the role of Buddha disciple by chanting to him, being a student by listening to dharmma talk, daugther to my mom and still had to go back and play the role of a good daughther-in-law to my mother-in-law. Haiz why life had to be so difficult and full of responsiblities?
Tired and occupied. Runaway time to a quiet and relaxing place with my beloved hubby. 11Days of holiday to Thailand:) Giving ourselves a break from our hetic lifestyle. No more work, no more responsibilites, no more cooking, no more house hold chores, no more parents, families, hee hee
Spending quiet quality time together with hubby in our own world, no more playing different roles:) juz eat, sleep, play and concentrate on shopping and spending our hard-earned money Wohoo, Thailand here we are coming. But we will not forget about Buddha and Bodhisattva, we will forever worship you. Will spend some time in this holiday reflecting on the dharmma.
When i got my house key, i am busy with my new house renovation and almost all of them are diy by me and hubby:) I had even became a painting expert by helping my hubby paint the whole house. Three bedrooms and 1 living room:).
Now, looking back and seeing the whole house covered with paints ect. These are the result of our hardwork of labour and sweat. We had diy the kitchen cabinet, sink, one table hanged on the wall, dining table and chair, tv console, walk-in-wardrobe, our platform bed and a feature wall to cover up the ugly bomb shelter.
We had refused to spend the money for renovation as we are thinking of selling off the house and moving to a smaller house 5 years later. Now, i am glad that we did save all our hard-earned money from spending them on those renovation contractors.
Firstly, now the market is so bad and we can't withdraw our money from our investment, if not we will lose a huge amount.
Secondly, we are hardly at home. Weekdays whole day off to work, back at home 7.30pm. Saturday half of the day spent doing household chores, 5pm off to the temple, 11pm back at home sleep. Sunday, Morning 8am off to the temple again, need to go back to mother-in-law's house, my mother's house. Back at home at night again.
So, now my life is more routine and occupied. Weekdays work, Saturday household chores and temple, Sunday morning temple, afternoon and evening still had to go back to my mother and parent-in-laws' house.
Poor hubby and me, hardly had time for ourselves. Our life is occupied with entertaining and playing different roles and characters. For me, subordinate to my bosses in my office, dutiful, loving and caring wife to my hubby at home, had some quiet time with Buddha and Bodhisattva, for weekend, became a maid liao, keeping the house clean and tidy, washing clothes ect. In the temple, play the role of Buddha disciple by chanting to him, being a student by listening to dharmma talk, daugther to my mom and still had to go back and play the role of a good daughther-in-law to my mother-in-law. Haiz why life had to be so difficult and full of responsiblities?
Tired and occupied. Runaway time to a quiet and relaxing place with my beloved hubby. 11Days of holiday to Thailand:) Giving ourselves a break from our hetic lifestyle. No more work, no more responsibilites, no more cooking, no more house hold chores, no more parents, families, hee hee
Spending quiet quality time together with hubby in our own world, no more playing different roles:) juz eat, sleep, play and concentrate on shopping and spending our hard-earned money Wohoo, Thailand here we are coming. But we will not forget about Buddha and Bodhisattva, we will forever worship you. Will spend some time in this holiday reflecting on the dharmma.
Monday, September 29, 2008
AN UPSIDE DOWN WORLD
Found this to be a very meaningful link.
http://www.buddhanet.net/pdf_file/UpSideDown.pdf
It's about four person whom are unhappy with their life and finally they are able to find peace and happiness by following Buddha's teaching.
I tend to be unhappy with life sometimes as it will tend to be setbacks, strong desire, sickness and craving within myself but i know that i can overcome all these by following Buddha's Teaching sincerely.
May Myself, my family and all the beings in the world be well and happy always.
http://www.buddhanet.net/pdf_file/UpSideDown.pdf
It's about four person whom are unhappy with their life and finally they are able to find peace and happiness by following Buddha's teaching.
I tend to be unhappy with life sometimes as it will tend to be setbacks, strong desire, sickness and craving within myself but i know that i can overcome all these by following Buddha's Teaching sincerely.
May Myself, my family and all the beings in the world be well and happy always.
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